Parenting

I have been thinking about kids "these days" lately. I honestly think with all of the research and resources out there we should have the best behaved kids of all time. I mean kids will be kids but I hear a 10-year old curse at his mother and I am floored! I would NEVER speak like that to my mom. With everything that we know about the development of children and how they learn why are kids getting even more undisiplined?

I try to think logically about parenting. I have put Addy in time out since she was about a year old. She knows what time out is, and sometimes she even puts herself in time out when she does something she shouldn't. She knows that to get out of time out she needs to appoligize for what she's done and say why she's been put in time out. BUT what do I do now that she has figured this out and uses it to munipulate me? I mean, she's 2! However, as soon as I put her in time out she looks at me with those crystal blue eyes and says "Sorry Mommy, Sorry" and gives me a hug. What am I supposed to do with that?!!!! Keep her in time out for the whole 2 minutes?! I promise, children have been sent here more to teach thier parents then for us to teach them.

I don't like to catagorize children as "Behind" or "Advanced" but anyone that meets Addy knows she learns very quickly. So forgive me for using the word but her pediatrician uses it. I think having an "advanced" child has challenges of it's own. Sometimes I forget that Addy really is only 2. There are impulses and pure curiousity that cause her to do things like stand in the dog dish or empty out the entire contents of the cherrios box down to every last O. I try to set boundries but also let her explore and figure out the world with few limitations. I believe this is how we all learn. Keeping her from danger is of course my number one priority but as long as it's not affecting others I try to let her discover this life for herself. Sure it may result in a messy little girl but that's what bathtubs are for.

So here are a few of my own parenting philosophies...

"If they won't choke on it or if it won't kill them, let them put it in thier mouth."
This includes dirt, leaves, worms, wrenches, and anything else they find. This putting stuff in the mouth thing will go away eventually.

"Teach manners"
Please and thank you, they're called the magic words. There are reasons for this. Not only does it make others feel good and make you a pleasure to be around but also teaches us to be aware of others and to be grateful.

"Ask kids their opinion"
Who likes to be bullied? Not I! That "Because I said so" was never a good enough answer for me. As much as I believe in teaching respect it comes from being an example. Showing respect to kids by asking what they think or feel will cause them to do the same. Granted there are some times when things aren't up for debate but if a kid learns respect they will know when those times are.

So here's the thing, we've been trusted to raise these little bundles. The whole point in raising them is to be the best people they can be and to make the world a better place in the future. If I slack on my part, then what kind of life are my kids going to have and what kind of a world will this be?

Parenting is hard! It takes patience and endurance. I feel like such a failure when I watch certain moms in action because I don't know it all! And I am certainly learning as I go along but I try to think about things and not act on impluse when it comes to parenting. Now, not acting on impulse when it comes to chocolate, that's a completely different story and I cannot hold myself responsible for any actions taken. ;)